Peace

And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:7

I struggled with writing this post because I didn’t really want to talk about sad things, but I need to add a little bit to what I shared last time.

I briefly mentioned tragedies in general, but I need to share some specific things, just as a testament to what the Lord has helped me through over the years.

• When I was seven, my 19 year-old cousin died unexpectedly of an aneurysm while mowing. I adored her and was devastated when I found out. I remember running to my bedroom and laying on the floor, sobbing, and then just not being able to stop crying.
• When I was 18, my paternal grandpa died when he was hit by a car while checking the mail. He was the Papaw that was all about bear hugs and buying candy at the store.
• The next year, my maternal grandpa was diagnosed with cancer and only lived a few months after that. He was the Papaw who played guitar and sang with me.
• Almost two years ago, our preacher’s wife (my Church Mama) died unexpectedly in an accident. When I was told, I found myself laying on the floor, sobbing uncontrollably just like my seven-year-old self many years before.

I chose to share these specific episodes because they were so unexpected and literally knocked me off my feet. These were times when I was shaken to the core and wondered how I was going to go on. Times when I questioned, “Why?” and even felt angry. Some of the darkest times of my life, that could have turned me into a bitter person and made me give up on God.

But God is bigger than the worst hurt and pain I can imagine. I don’t know how He does it, but every time He has calmed my soul and brought me out of the darkness. He has given me peace and comfort, even though I don’t understand the why. I will probably never have the answers to all the questions concerning these circumstances, but I know that God knows why. And I know that He knows best.

In an unexplainable way, remembering the sadness strengthens my faith and gives me hope for tomorrow. I know that whatever happens, good or bad, that God will be there. I can count on Him to carry me through when I can’t stand and get me back on my feet again.

I know that those of you reading this have no doubt experienced similar happenings and probably worse. I hope and pray that you have Jesus to help you through and fill you with the peace that only He can give.

This is a recording of our youth choir a few years ago. This song just goes along perfectly with what I’m trying to say.